Hiding

Hi. I can't be too sure why I'm still up... I'm running on three hours of sleep, I did nothing but sit (Lexie would be proud) all day, and I'm about to pass out right now, but just can't. I'm in that phase where I want it to be any time except right now. I wish it was tomorrow, hanging out with the guys all night. I wish it was last weekend, with Techfest, Kelly's get together, and just spending time with the guys in general. I wish it was two weeks from now, jamming out to Third Eye Blind in a mixed up state of mind, with Dave back. I wish it was still my senior year, with so many friends, parties, and just having the time of my life. I wish it was September, hanging out in the apartment all day, exploring our lives at night, relishing in having my freedom back. Too much wishing. I guess I'll have to stay right here at the moment and wait until the morning comes for this weird phase to pass. Maybe I listened to way too much Kid Cudi today.
That has to be it. Kid freaking Cudi. And "Pursuit of Happiness," that song about how he'll be fine when he achieves happiness. I mean, come on! That guy has one of the most recognizable names on the planet right now. He has....everything. If a guy like that can honestly say that he's not happy, what does that say about the average person? Maybe he just smokes way too much weed...yea that's definitely it.
In the meanwhile, I decided to creep the living crap out of my own facebook. I looked at all of my pictures, videos, notes. Man, have I lived. But there's also plenty more living to go.
Also, a couple of days ago, I had a dream/nightmare. I was at my wedding. But there wasn't a bride. Not like she had cold feet, like there just...wasn't a bride. I don't remember if I had to choose someone, or if I was just stupid enough to throw myself a bride-less wedding. I have no idea how to interpret that. Should I get my butt out there and find someone (I mean, I'm 19, I have a ways ahead of me)? Should I wait it out (hopefully not til I'm 40), so there might actually be a bride? Not sure. I think I'll know when I feel it. That's my two cents. I think I'm gonna try to sleep now...